"Joe Horowitz" <jh007c3183NOSPAM@blueyonder.co.uk> wrote in message
news:al29iv$1meen2$1@ID-146919.news.dfncis.de...
>
> "Serious Tiger" <serious_tiger@bigfoot.com> wrote in message
> news:3d74a09c.16196980@usenet.plus.net...
> > On 3 Sep 2002 03:01:45 -0700, simon@thomas299.freeserve.co.uk (=?ISO-8859-1?Q?Tommo_=B3?=) wrote:
> > >Linfield are suing Keane for this piece of fiction from his ghost
> > >writer, but I think they'll find its a case of "get the the back of
> > >the queue" ;
> > >
> > Like a certain African footballing nation, the mighty weight of Linfield's
> > legal machine should never be underestimated.  By the time they've finished
> > with him, no doubt, he won't have a pot to piss in....
>
> How Keane ever got permission from Fergie to publish his book, I'll never
> know. I've just got my copy through the post today, and I'll tell you
> something, you ain't heard nothing yet. Here are just some of the passages
> that have caught my eye upon initial perusal:
>
> "Yeah, its true, we should never have let the title slip to Arsenal that
> time. The trouble was, many of the players had put bets on Arsenal winning
> the league at the start of the season, and so we had to throw a couple of
> matches to get our money back."
>
> "Fergie? Oh, he doesn't really run the club. He's just a glorified spokesman
> really. Phil Neville makes most of the decisions, who plays, who doesn't,
> who we buy, who we sell, what formation we play. How do you think he keeps
> his place in the team?"
>
> "The Queen? It's all a big lie. She's not even English, ffs. She's from
> Jamaica, and she's a man. It's true."
>
> "Football? Well, it's shit really, isn't it. Never liked it. I only play for
> the money. I think it's great the way we rip millions of children off every
> year, but if they're stupid enough to spend fifty quid on a poxy t-shirt,
> that's hardly my problem, is it."
>
> "Ireland? I fucking hate playing for Ireland, it's a shithole. I couldn't
> have been happier when Mick let me go home, the last thing I wanted to do
> was play in the stupid World Cup. Its just a fucking panto really. I mean,
> if I really cared about Ireland, I'd have stayed there. I wouldn't have
> moved to England."
>
> "Not a lot of people know this, but David Beckham had an affair last year.
> Seriously. In fact, I think I'm the only person that knows this. At least, I
> was. Yeah, he confided in me one drunken evening. Some slapper from Norwich,
> apparently. Said he regretted it and all that, and that he'd never do
> anything to jeopardise his family again. I can respect that. I just hope
> Posh never finds out about it."
>
> Honestly, it's a great read. I recommend it.
>
> Joe
> --
> "Did you miss a digit off Joe's score?"
>
>
>
>

The FA are aparently waiting to see if there is any "Mother Theresa" type
stuff in there (I'm not kidding - that was the actual phrase one of them
used) to even up the grim bits. So we can surely expect to see :

"I waited . . . I fu**ing hit her hard. Take that, you c**t. You're not even
Monk, you Nun c**t. Stick it up your bollocks. . I (didn't) wait for her
security guards to subdue me. I turned and jumped into the back of the near
by patrol vehicle."